


your hands are shaking cold, your hands are mine to hold

by notthebigspoon



Series: After the Rain [11]
Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-26
Updated: 2012-08-26
Packaged: 2017-11-12 23:20:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/496791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notthebigspoon/pseuds/notthebigspoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eli's starting to think he's packed away more emotions and life changing events in the past month than he has in the past year.</p><p>Title taken from Move Along by The All-American Rejects.</p>
            </blockquote>





	your hands are shaking cold, your hands are mine to hold

“This sucks.”

“I know it does.”

“I'm a shitty father.”

“You are not. Don't be an idiot.”

“I did all this and for what? To leave him with someone else a week at a time?” Jonathan sounds absolutely miserable and it makes Eli's heart ache in his chest.

He takes a breath, rubbing his eyes against the sting of the tears and forcing himself to speak calmly, “It's the lesser evil, Johnny. I know you hate having a nanny but you said yourself that she seemed like a very nice woman. Isn't that better?”

“Yes but-”

“No but, Jonathan. No but.” Eli says, and his voice is firm. He's stopping this in his tracks, he's not going to let his husband keep punishing himself. “He's not spending the week with someone who is going to make him miserable just because they can like his loser stepdad. He's going to be with someone that's going to make sure he's happy and healthy until you come back.”

It's quiet for a little while. He can practically hear Jonathan's agonizing inner monologue. He can hear the moment he calms down and makes peace with what Eli's trying to convince him of. “You're not a loser.”

"Wait, what?" Eli squawks indignantly but it's worth it for the way Jonathan finally, _finally_ laughs. “You know who I meant, pendejo.”

“Baby, I love you, but your pronunciation sucks.” Jonathan all but giggles.

That's true enough. Then again, that hadn't been his focus when he'd been learning Spanish. It hadn't even been so he could speak it with Jonathan or understand the Spanish speaking guys on the team. His primary motivation had been being able to understand Jonathan's family and whatever insults they were slinging his way on a given day.

He's relieved, really. They're back on even ground, Jonathan's laughing again. But as relieving as it is, it's also exhausting. The month has been a roller coaster of emotions, Eli no more processing one set than another event occurs and he has a whole new set to deal with. The mutual surprise visits. Jonathan telling Eli how miserable Christian was. The custody hearing. Finally deciding to be open about their marriage.

As promised, Jonathan and Christian had met him in Reno. Christian had ran towards him and attacked him with a bear hug, telling Eli how much that he had missed him, a sentiment Eli had returned. Jonathan had joined them and asked if he didn't get any love at all. Eli hadn't even spared a glance for his teammates, had met him with a brief hug and a quick kiss before they'd split away to go back to Jonathan and Christian's hotel.

It bears no significance to Christian. Jonathan had sat him down at the beginning, explained the way things were and just who Eli was to him. Eli is his stepdad, daddy's husband, the maker of chocolate chip pancakes. His teammates on the other hand. He'd heard surprise, quiet approval, likely from the ones that already knew, and a few murmurs of derision or disgust. 

None of that matters because holy fuck, he'd kissed his husband in an airport.

The days they were able to spend with him, when he wasn't in practice or playing, they'd went out and did _something_ together because he wasn't wasting the time that he had with them. He'd gotten the call in the early morning, before the sun was even up. Jonathan had grumbled against his hair, muttered for him to ignore it but Eli knew, _knew_ it was important.

When he'd hung up, he'd just sat up in bed and rested his arm on his knees, staring at his hands before grinning and laughing. Jonathan had nudged him with his arm, muttered, “What the hell is wrong with you? Go back to sleep.”

“Can't.” He'd laughed, kissing Jonathan hard before climbing out of bed and scrambling to pack his things. “Gotta get on a flight to San Francisco. They want me back up.”

Jonathan had helped him pack, had roused a drowsy Christian to go with them to the airport in spite of the time. He'd gotten his ticket, hugged them both goodbye and kissed Jonathan before boarding his plane. Less than two hours later he was walking out of the airport only to be greeted by Timmy and Weezy both. He'd hugged them in turn before climbing into the back of Tim's car.

It's weird, really. He's sitting in the clubhouse, back in the Show again and happy to be there. The past several days are far away. Even this morning or maybe especially this morning, feels like it happened weeks ago instead of just hours. He'd called Jonathan the first moment he'd had to spare.

“Earth to Whiteside.”

“Sorry. Just... thinking about this week. This month. Fucking crazy, huh?”

“Yeah, no kidding. Any of the guys know?”

“Nah, I haven't said anything. Don't plan on it either. Just going to do it like we talked about. If it comes up, I'm honest about it. That's all. Kiss.”

“Huh?”

“Keep it simple stupid.”

“That's a nice way to talk to your husband.”

Eli snorts. “I told you baby, romance is dead. Look, I should probably get off of here. Haven't eaten anything since we had dinner last night and I'm near about to starve. Give our boy another hug for me. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

“Bye.”

He can't stop grinning as he makes his way back to his locker. He puts his phone away, changes out of his street clothes and into shorts and a t-shirt to warm up. He parks himself in catering with a sandwich and chips, watches the other guys floating in and out, pegs the new team romances and tries to figure out who Belt is shagging now.

“Whitey! Glad to see you.” Bumgarner grins, thumping him on the back as he passes. “Life going alright?”

Eli thinks on it before shrugging and smiling to himself. “Life going perfect.”


End file.
